Kehidupan peribadi

Saya mempunyai banyak dosa-dosa silam, antaranya saya terlalu lantang bersuara sehingga ludah kelangit dan terpalit ke wajah sendiri. Lalu saya menjadi berhati-hati bila bersuara. Pedih bila seseorang datang kepada kita dan berkata; eh, bukan dulu kau pernah cakap takkan buat benda macam tu? dan hakikatnya saya buat perkara yang pernah saya katakan tak akan buat.

Being cautions makes it difficult for me to write truly from heart. I dont want to spill too much on my personal life but this is my diary, it's my personal space which I let public to read. Yeah, that sounds confusing. So, as we're approaching towards the end of 2014, I feel like there's so much things that I havent achieved. Especially as I already passed living quarter of century.

Pembukaan tahun 2015 bakal menjadi menarik. Terlalu banyak perubahan bakal berlaku. Bermula dengan skop kerja di ofis sehinggalah kehidupan personal. Ia mengujakan dan juga menakutkan pada yang sama. Dalam ruang skop kerja, saya bakal beralih kepada skop kerja yang lebih mencabar setelah senior sepejabat memilih untuk berhenti kerja. Saya menjangkakan kerja yang lebih tekanan daripada sekarang (haha!). Sejak mula bekerja, ahli asal team saya sudah banyak bertukar ganti. Ramai yang sudah tiada dan berganti dengan orang baru. Semoga ahli baru ini mampu menjadikan suasana kerja yang harmoni dan menyenangkan seperti sedia kala. ameen.

Kehidupan personal saya juga bakal berubah dengan drastik. Saya bakal membuat keputusan terbesar di dalam hidup untuk sepanjang hayat. Saya bakal mempunyai rutin-rutin baru. Semua ini sangat menakutkan namun mengenangkan saya bakal melalui semua ini dengan lelaki (inshaAllah) yang terbaik untuk saya, yang saya sayangi dan hormati selama ini. Semoga segalanya berjalan dengan lancar. ameen.

So, that's probably a wrap for my whole 2014. My apology for lack of update this year, I'll try to improve it in years to come. :)

Gomen oh gomen

I have a lot of things in my mind right now. there could be more than one post tonight or maybe only this one. and against my principle, i'll write in combination of both in bahasa and english. So, please pardon my rojakness.

I'm not a government servant though the prospect of becoming one is tempting (pension and all other benefits) but I'm a daughter of government servants. I've live long enough to see there's a very little growth in the all ministry in dealing with disaster. Aside of, if you always dealt with government, you still experience slow service and grumpy front desk. Come on, if you worked in private sector, you'll always see a young lass with wide smile at the front desk. Ok,  this is minor things/issues but yet to be improved.

My anger triggered since the leak of UPSR exam paper. It seems simple but it's enough to show how inadequate the ministry to handle the issue. Yes, we have standard SOP with backup exam question. if we didnt, it means we're still in stone aged. But it's not efficient and definitely not enough. It get so hectic and new date almost a month a way. We need to improve and dont let an old SOP stop us. Always revised the SOP and make sure to go through it every year. Dont go fire-fighting. When things like this happened, stop giving excuses that we arent ready just because it never happened before. We need to start working like a profit based company where incompetency could cost money or fatality!


Now, flooding all over Malaysia. I couldnt care less whether PM is in Hawaii or whatnot. But government as a whole (kementerian) should have prepare for this. Year over year, we saw flood victims at school with lack of food or some didnt get to be saved. We saw it every freaking year and eventhough we've been hit hard last year at Kuantan, we didnt seems to improve. It's heartbreaking to see condition at Kelantan right now. Yes, I blame all kementerian because they were never fully prepared. same excuses every year that things went out of control. I did not blame abang sado polis, tentera, bomba dan kakak doktor, mesi sebab mereka dah jalankan tugas dengan jayanya. I blame kementerian for their inefficiency in coordinating everything.

I hate when they become so defensive instead of trying to improve. I hate watching and reading the same news every end of year. After 57 years of independence, we arent really go anywhere.